and it's been only a mere 29 hours since the moment I sent my soul out into cyber space via this blog.
I believe many thanks are in order. for allowing me to take this very big step in my journey. and for speaking back to me. it's a conversation I started that needs to be had more often.
from now on my posts will drift in and out of explicit and implied.
---now bare with me as I switch gears and get all vague and wordy on you again. because I simply must put this out there. right now---
I am shocked to find myself in an intensely frustrating and oddly compelling impasse (in another, much brighter, but equally weighty area of my life) with someone who I can only think of one sentence to describe...
I've met my match. (does it sound like a duel to you too? it's certainly feeling like one to me)
and for how hard I've worked to suppress and deny my competitive side. this person really brings it out in me easily. and I haven't worked out whether all this is good or bad yet. the kind of fire and passion to this side of me is an undeniable essential to my entire make-up. maybe once we define the stakes and winnings I will know more. or maybe we should just be on the same team?
gah. this stupid sports analogy has gone on 6 sentences too long and shown all types of things that are unattractive about me... I'm going to bed. I'll revisit all this another day.