Freakin' hippy's. :)
Lovely retreat so far. I've been at this yoga business for 4 years now... And I am still at the very beginning of the beginning of my journey. Exciting, no?
This morning as i jerked through second series my mind kept telling me to quit. My body felt stiff from my week in bed and traveling all day yesterday. So my mind kept saying things like 'my ovary hurts', 'I'm too tired', 'I'm too weak', 'i don't know enough'. In yoga this destructive voice is called the inner critic. I'd like to dismiss mine and replace it with a more truthful voice, known as the inner guru. Or maybe just hoping to lose my inner voice completely, live more from my heart and spirit. Because being hurried or stressed or anxious are states of mind, no? Gah, I've trapped myself in my own words again...
Here's something though:
Today was the first time I have been even remotely alone in the great outdoors since it happened... I stood looking at the river in a flow of pine trees. With faint sounds of the group chanting in the sweat lodge and burning sage weaving through my salt curled hair, I cried. I cried three tears that rolled into one stream under my chin and swiftly dried up.
It is the beginning... and I can do anything I want. And I will always be healing and life will be a gracious procession of phases and drags.
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